today in reflection

As I look back on today I realize that one of those fears you have as a parent was eased. Then as I thought about parental fears I thought I would write something for all you newbies out there.

The day you find out your pregnant you begin to have fears. At first its something like will the baby be normal- all ten fingers and toes?? For some its about themselves too...how much weight will I gain ( I never worried about that) what will I have to give up (for me that was smoking)??And then the big one will I/we be a good parent???

Then as you D-day approaches your worries become more present. What will the labor be like, can I do it, will I need an operation, what if something goes wrong??

Its amazing how within minutes of bringing a new life into the world all those short sited fears suddenly melt away to be replaced by an entirely new set of fears and how some of the old ones get intensified. But let me tell you the question "will I be or am I a good parent?" that question never goes away. Suddenly though as you gaze as your portrait of perfection you become your parents. How do we instill good morals and judgement, what kind of person will you grow up to be, how can I protect you from all of ulgy and bad things in the world?

Then you come home and the questions get short sighted again. Will I make it through the night becomes a constant question. How do I do this or that? Is that normal? What are you thinking? Do you like me?

As your baby grows and becomes their own person some fears are eased and some intensify. One of your biggest fears as your baby reaches school age is "will the other kids like him/her, will she/he have any friends."

That was my fear for Bay. Anyone that's met her will tell you she has an awesome personality and is outgoing and friendly. But the problem with her is she is OVERLY friendly...like in your face. Which is fairly intimidating for most young children, but as I saw that she has friends and is well like by most of her classmates my fears were put to rest today.

I guess as parents we never stop worrying-its built in to our DNA.